WANTED, MAN BUT ONLY OUT OF CURIOSITY AND BECAUSE I MIGHT RUN OUT OF THINGS TO WRITE ABOUT

Details Below

sign on tree that reads:WANTED: MAN, but only out of curiosity and because I might run out of things to write about, details below: Man who doesn’t talk too much.

WANTED: MAN, but only out of curiosity and because I might run out of things to write about, details below:

Man who doesn’t talk too much. Old, like me. Man who has something he loves to do all by himself. For hours. Anything, as long as it isn’t in the room where I sit. Paint, clay, wood, sing, read, anything. Man who doesn’t require three meals a day unless he cooks two of them himself. The first two. I never eat breakfast or lunch. I think those meals are unnecessary. I will make coffee, though. Man who does his own laundry and doesn’t require a closet. There aren’t any closets here, well, a few, but very small and dark. Man who doesn’t mind sleeping on a sofa with a dog if he doesn’t climb stairs anymore. I sleep on a sofa with the other dog. Man who can still drive a car but never tailgates. Man who will talk when upset, but doesn’t go on and on. Man at peace with himself despite what may have been a rotten childhood. Man who either doesn’t have one of those phones, or if he does, does not stare into it all the time. Or not at all, that would be better. I do not have a phone like that. Mine rings, and that’s all it knows how to do. Man with good manners toward people who wait on him in restaurants. Man who is a good tipper. Man who won’t take it personally if I forget everything we talked about yesterday. Or even this morning. Man who doesn’t nag a woman about habits like the occasional cigarette. Man who will enjoy knowing that the Indo-European Root for nag was a word that meant “gnaw.” Man who won’t mind if I repeat myself. Man who is funny and makes me laugh. Man who will think I am funny too. Man with a good laugh. I love a man with a good laugh.

Oh, right. I am an eighty-four year old woman who loves to write. I was thinking I might want something new to write about. I’m not really serious about the man part, just the man wanted part. Not really serious about that, either. I think I wanted to find out what I wanted if I wanted it. Just joking around.

I wrote this for fun. Two days later I realized that half of my requirements fit my old pal Chuck. Oh well.